We found out on Saturday that she has a large mass in her abdomen. Things went from bad to worse over the weekend and we spent a sleepless night with her on Sunday in our apartment as she seemed to have several small seizures. Long story short, we have been in the hospital with her for the past two days trying to figure out exactly what is going on and what the best course of action is for her.
I have never cried so many tears or been so devastated. I love this dog like I never thought possible. We have been on a roller coaster from thinking we need to put her down...to "wait and see"... to surgery and round and round.
As of early this morning, we thought we were going to have to make the decision that no pet owner ever wants to make. As we were struggling with this, we got to take her outside of the hospital for a walk, and some time alone with her to think. She was so alert and happy--it made us re-evaluate our initial gut-decision that we were leaning towards. Based on this, and with the help of the wonderful doctors, we came to the conclusion that the surgery might save her life (for a while) and would not be a painful course of treatment for her.
After we made the decision, we had to wait many hours to get her into surgery. We spent the morning and the afternoon with her sitting outside the hospital on 55th Street. It was such a beautiful spring day so we decided not to waste it in the waiting room.
She laid her big furry body right on top of me.
She even fell asleep for a while right on the sidewalk (in the midst of the flower petals blowing off a nearby tree). I rolled up my sweater as a little pillow under her head.
At first I was unsure about taking pictures, but as I realized what a special day it was going to be, I brought out the iPhone. The afternoon was like a dream. No matter what happens, this day will give me some peace.
As I write this, Willow is just coming out of a successful surgery to have her spleen removed. I am so hoping that she will pull through the surgery, have a good recovery, and spend some quality time with us before we have to make any more difficult decisions. I hope that we have made the right choice. Please send Willow your best healing vibes over the coming days and weeks. I will keep you posted when I have time (and I may not be around commenting much until things settle down).